A Few For The Girls

One for the girls

Now I lay me down to sleep
I pray the Lord my shape to keep.
Please no wrinkles, Please no bags
And please lift my butt before it sags.
Please no age spots, Please no gray
And as for my belly, Please take it away.
Please keep me he althy, Please keep me young,
And thank you Dear Lord, For all that you've done.

Five tips for a woman.....
1. It is important that a man helps you around the house and has a job.
2. It is important that a man makes you laugh.
3. It is important to find a man you can count on and doesn't lie to you.
4. It is important that a man loves you and spoils you.
5. It is important that these four men don't know each other.

Foot Note:
One saggy boob said to the other saggy boob:
'If we don't get some support soon, people will think we're nuts.'

Top 10 Beauty Tips From Abanna Cheshire

Top 10 Beauty Tips For The Rest Of Us

1. Have a pimple in the middle of your forehead? Tell people you are part unicorn and your magical powers are about to fully manifest.

2. To whiten your teeth... two words: White Out

3. Got dry skin? Stay in water at all times.

4. Need to remove stains from clothes? One word: scissors.

5. Got greasy hair? Tell people you are cultivating a naturally renewable, eco-friendly fuel alternative.

6. Got excess body hair? Braid it. Add beads for a touch of bling.

7. Oily skin? See #5.

8. Got frizzy, dry or brittle hair? Tell people you are the primary supplier for new eco-friendly brillo pad alternative.

9. Over-weight? Tell people that their eyes are formatted to wide screen and you have been formatted for tv.

10. Broken, chipped or brittle fingernails? Tell people that they got that way while you were mangling a fashionista who criticized your appearance.

That's it for now....so go forth and be thyself!

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