Top 10 Beauty Tips For The Rest Of Us
1. Have a pimple in the middle of your forehead? Tell people you are part unicorn and your magical powers are about to fully manifest.
2. To whiten your teeth... two words: White Out
3. Got dry skin? Stay in water at all times.
4. Need to remove stains from clothes? One word: scissors.
5. Got greasy hair? Tell people you are cultivating a naturally renewable, eco-friendly fuel alternative.
6. Got excess body hair? Braid it. Add beads for a touch of bling.
7. Oily skin? See #5.
8. Got frizzy, dry or brittle hair? Tell people you are the primary supplier for new eco-friendly brillo pad alternative.
9. Over-weight? Tell people that their eyes are formatted to wide screen and you have been formatted for tv.
10. Broken, chipped or brittle fingernails? Tell people that they got that way while you were mangling a fashionista who criticized your appearance.
That's it for now....so go forth and be thyself!
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