Obsessions of Young Mothers

A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with four young mothers and their small children. 'You all have obsessions,' he observed.

To the first mother, Mary, he said, 'You are obsessed with eating. You've even named your daughter Candy.'

He turned to the second Mom, Ann: 'Your obsession is with money. Again, it manifests itself in your child's name, Penny.'

He turned to the third Mom, Joyce: 'Your obsession is alcohol. This too shows itself in your child's name, Brandy.'

At this point, the fourth mother, Kathy, quietly got up, took her little boy by the hand and whispered, 'Come on, Dick, this guy has no idea what he's talking about. Let's go pick up Peter and Willy from school and go get dinner.'

The Eulogy

She married and had 13 children. Her husband died.
She married again and had 7 more children. Again, her husband died.
But she remarried and this time had 5 more children. Again, her husband
died. And alas, she finally died.

Standing before her coffin, the preacher prayed for her.

He thanked The Lord for this very loving woman and said, "Lord,
they're finally together."

One mourner leaned over and quietly asked her friend, "Do you
think he means her first, second or third husband?"

The friend replied, "I think he means her legs."