Actually Taken From Classified Ads In Newspapers:
FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER. 8 YEARS OLD. HATEFUL LITTLE DOG.
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FREE PUPPIES: 쩍 COCKER SPANIEL 쩍 SNEAKY NEIGHBOR'S DOG
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FREE PUPPIES... PART GERMAN SHEPHERD, PART STUPID DOG
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GERMAN SHEPHERD 85 lbs. NEUTERED. SPEAKS GERMAN. FREE.
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FOUND: DIRTY WHITE DOG. LOOKS LIKE A RAT... BEEN OUT AWHILE. BETTER BE
REWARD.
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1 MAN, 7 WOMAN HOT TUB -- $850/offer
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SNOW BLOWER FOR SALE... ONLY USED ON SNOWY DAYS.
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COWS, CALVES NEVER BRED... ALSO 1 GAY BULL FOR SALE.
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NORDIC TRACK $300 HARDLY USED, CALL CHUBBY
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HUMMERS - LARGEST SELECTION EVER - "IF IT'S IN STOCK, WE HAVE IT!"
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GEORGIA PEACHES CALIFORNIA GROWN - 89 cents lb.
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NICE PARACHUTE: NEVER OPENED - USED ONCE
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TIRED OF WORKING FOR ONLY $9.75 PER HOUR? WE OFFER PROFIT SHARING AND
FLEXIBLE HOURS. STARTING PAY: $7 -- $9 PER HOUR.
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EXERCISE EQUIPMENT: QUEEN SIZE MATTRESS & BOX SPRINGS - $175.
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JOINING NUDIST COLONY! MUST SELL WASHER & DRYER $300.
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ALZHEIMER'S CENTER PREPARES FOR AN AFFAIR TO REMEMBER
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OPEN HOUSE BODY SHAPERS TONING SALON FREE COFFEE & DONUTS
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(AND THE BEST ONE) FOR SALE BY OWNER Complete set of Encyclopedia
Britannica. 45 volumes. Excellent condition. $1,000.00 or best offer. No longer
needed. Got married last weekend. Wife knows everything.
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